So you always heard rumors that the State Department was recruiting spies among the Fullbright scholars and Peace Corps volunteers scattered around the world, and today adorable idealist John Alexander van Schaick (pictured!) blabbed all to ABC News. Stationed in Bolivia, he was asked by U.S. embassy officials to keep reports on all the Cuban and Venezuelan medical volunteers he ran into because of “the fight against terrorism” and all. And he was “appalled.” Good on you, dude!
But all this raises a number of important questions, not the least of which is what kind of fucked-up judgment does our retarded international spy network have? I mean look at this kid with his scruffy beard and his Che Vive hat for crying out loud! Somebody in your government took a look at him and was like, "There goes the next Ollie North." Hey hippie! Wanna come spy for The Man? Honestly we’re pretty fucking lucky the Bolivians have peaceful intentions or they would have conquered our ass by now.
