Pretend, just for a moment, that you are a morbidly obese Italian-Venezuelan FBI informant, lamely attempting to entrap high ranking officials in the Chavez administration. Your "plan," such as it is, is to demand a $2 million dollar cash payment from the big C himself, in exchange for keeping quiet about some improprieties you claim to have witnessed. Only of course it's a set up, and your demand letter will be written by the FBI, and instead of keeping quiet, you plan to tell the whole story to the press and embarrass the Venezuelans. Only the Venezuelans don't bite, and not only do they not give you the money, they don't even bother responding to your dumb letter at all. Sad times, right?
But questions remain, such as who would be your go-to guy in the US press corps, the one you and the FBI trust enough to tell your side of the story, without questioning the sloppy, contorted, harebrained scheme behind it all? God Bless this Valijagate trial, because we now know the answer to that question. Meet Our Man in Miami: the Herald's own narcissist-retardist douchebag columnist extraordinaire, Andres Oppenheimer! Shocking, I know. (Link is in Spanish, sorry.)
