Can't Wait for the Lou Dobbs Special on This Dude
It was a Minuteman bedtime story come true: A swarthy mass murdering terrorist snuck on to ‘merican soil to destroy our way of life. The cold-blooded bomb-making Mexican-talking illegal alien foreigner thumbed his nose at our lax border security, our heritage and our values by holding a mocking press conference, in Spanish, daring our brave men at the Department of Homeland Security to find him. Eventually, they did, but because of our left wing ACLU-card holding America-hating liberal court system, run in no small part by feminist gay-marrying activist judges, he was quickly released, allowed to walk among us as a free man, cleverly disguised as teevee's "Matlock." He was probably even living across the street from your innocent blonde 5 year-old daughter. Until today.
Among the things we apparently can stand:
· Blowing up an airplane filled with Olympic athletes, killing all 73 onboard (He won’t be charged with any of that).
· Violating international law and ignoring our treaties with another country by refusing to extradite (It’s Venezuela, so it sort of doesn’t really count).
· Shamelessly pretending to give a crap about the rights of an alleged terrorist in order to violate our extradition agreement (See Padilla, Jose).
· Announcing to the world on September freaking eleventh that he was about to become a free man (We wish we'd just made that part up, but nope).
But today, America has come to its collective senses. We can forgive mass murder, but there is never an excuse for being an illegal.